Have you been in situations where looking back you should have felt intense fear but instead felt nothing? Did you minimize or deny rather than assess the circumstance accurately? This upside down response to threat is part of the freeze response. We often talk about the fight or flight response to threat, but the freeze …
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When you start healing from dysfunctional family dynamics, you learn the importance of setting boundaries. But those lessons from well-meaning people often re-inforce myths about boundaries that hinder your progress. The mainstream approach to boundary setting is highly strategic. It consists of a set of steps laid out in a one-size-fits-all fashion. When you’ve never …
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I’ve received countless questions about the challenges of being a parent with complex PTSD. How do you avoid making the same mistakes your parents did? In my experience, I’ve witnessed some common difficulties among parents with complex PTSD (including myself). I outline five of these stumbling blocks below and follow up with some solutions. 5 …
Do you ever dim your light or play small in order to feel accepted by others? Have you ever pretended to be less than what you really are because you had the feeling that belonging meant dumbing that down? I think especially if you’re an empath or maybe a deeper person than the average, you …
Read more “How to stop dimming your light and 3 reasons you do”
Tara Brach is a mindfulness teacher and psychologist who says when you should on yourself, you argue with reality. The word ‘should’ shows a lack of acceptance and a disconnection with yourself. I would add that it’s mean to should on yourself. I hear so many people on the healing journey who criticize themselves for …