Must reads to recognize & heal complex ptsd
How to attract the right people into your life
There’s a saying that your level of success and satisfaction in life is dependent on your ability to attract the right people into your life.
How to overcome maladaptive daydreaming
Many people who experienced childhood trauma learn to avoid painful feelings by escaping into fantasies or maladaptive daydreaming. I didn’t realize it at the time, but my reality was too painful to bear, so I escaped into daydreaming instead.
How to stop catastrophizing and improve your life
Catastrophizing means expecting the worst when something bad happens. It could be a coping mechanism learned in childhood to help you regulate your emotions.
How to stop wishing things were different to be happy
Oprah Winfrey says forgiveness means “giving up the hope that the past could be any different.” We hold ourselves back when we keep wishing things were different, either now or in the past.
How to overcome exhaustion from standing up for yourself
If you grew up in a family like mine, you probably never learned the art of standing up for yourself. In fact, you learned the opposite: how to suppress your needs in favor of others.
Signs you're in a fantasy relationship and how to stop
If you grew up with childhood emotional abuse and neglect, relationships of all kinds may baffle you. In romance you skip the getting to know you phase and propel yourself into a future of undying devotion.
How to ask for what you want without feeling guilty
Do you have trouble asking for what you want without feeling guilty? There are likely some good reasons for that which extend back to childhood.
How to know when "you ruin everything" means something else
Have you been told “you ruin everything”? Perhaps not in so many words. But expressing honest thoughts or feelings got you maligned or punished.
How to use mindfulness to overcome childhood trauma
Mindfulness has played a pivotal role in helping me overcome the symptoms of my unmet childhood needs. Many think of silent meditation when they hear the word. But it is far more accessible than that.
How to stop feeling lonely even when you're not alone
Many of us feel lonely even in a crowd of people. In fact, you might withdraw because you feel more lonely with others than you do on your own.
How to overcome the trauma of feeling invalidated
According to Bessel van der Kolk, trauma happens when we feel unseen or unknown. He wrote one of the most seminal books on the subject, The Body Keeps the Score.
Dealing with disappointment when you feel let down
Self compassion invites us to sink into our feelings rather than pushing them away or shaming ourselves. Through mindful self compassion practice, I’ve recently come to terms with the role of disappointment in my life.
How to overcome black and white thinking
One of the many outcomes of childhood trauma is black and white thinking. This is the all or nothing mentality that leaves no room for two things to be true at once.
How to know your window of tolerance
If you’re on a trauma healing journey, you may have heard the term “window of tolerance”. The concept, developed by Dan Siegel, refers to nervous system responses.
How to remedy a poor sense of self
One of the tragic outcomes of childhood trauma is a poor sense of self. When no one helps you understand yourself, that self has difficulty developing.