One of the reasons you struggle to tame your inner critic is the false belief that tough love is motivating. You believe being mean to yourself helps you achieve your goals. If you’re nice to yourself, you fear you’ll become lazy and get nothing done. If that were true, you would be much further ahead …
Read more “Why tough love never works but self compassion does”
You may have seen the term cycle breaker on Instagram and other media. It refers to someone challenging past generational patterns so they can live differently. A cycle breaker works to free themselves from the chains of dysfunctional family bonds. Their work in turn frees the generations that come after them. It does not affect …
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Have you ever been told to “let go” of resentment over how a family member treated you? Rather than letting go I suggest accepting their limitations instead. Accepting their limitations does not mean condoning bad behavior. It means letting go of the belief that they will ever change, and the magical thinking that they will …
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I’ve noticed a pattern among childhood trauma survivors. And that’s how quickly they rush to defend the parents who failed to give them what they needed. Just today, I watched a recorded session of a woman describing the devastating impact of her parents’ emotional neglect. She quickly followed that up by insisting they would do …
Parentification takes place when the needs of the parent come before those of the child. It results in a role reversal where the child takes on responsibilities that should belong to the parent. You may not realize you’ve been parentified because you didn’t have to cook dinner or care for younger siblings. If you had …
Read more “What is parentification and how to know if it applies”