Do you have trouble asking for what you want without feeling guilty? There are likely some good reasons for that which extend back to childhood.

According to Bessel van der Kolk, trauma happens when we feel unseen or unknown. He wrote one of the most seminal books on the subject, The Body Keeps the Score.

One of the many outcomes of childhood trauma is black and white thinking. This is the all or nothing mentality that leaves no room for two things to be true at once.

If you’re on a trauma healing journey, you may have heard the term “window of tolerance”. The concept, developed by Dan Siegel, refers to nervous system responses.

One of the tragic outcomes of childhood trauma is a poor sense of self. When no one helps you understand yourself, that self has difficulty developing.

The first therapist I ever saw gave me a book called Learned Optimism. This after finding out I suffered from a chronic need to expect the worst out of every situation.

One of the outcomes of childhood emotional neglect is a lost sense of self. You may feel like you’re not sure who you are or what you stand for.

Did you know self-awareness is the key to changing your life? But many of us who grew up in abusive or neglectful homes lack this basic component of a satisfying life.

Insecure attachment means we didn’t receive the care and protection we needed as children, and lost touch with our playful side.

Emotional flashbacks are different from the flashbacks we associate with PTSD. Rather than visual and auditory reminders of a specific event, emotional flashbacks are more of a feeling.

You’ve probably heard the common advice around procrastination. You need better habits and more willpower, or “just do it”.

If you come from a background of childhood abuse and neglect, visibility might seem harder for you than for others. It’s more than a matter of introvert vs. extrovert tendencies, or simply getting over yourself.

One of the key tools when reparenting yourself involves developing strong boundaries. When you’ve been raised to cater to everyone else’s needs, setting boundaries is far more difficult than it sounds.

It’s natural to experience an elevated sense of anxiety when a threat arises. Then your system quickly calms down when the danger subsides.

I first learned about healthy boundaries in my recovery program. Having been raised in a home where such things were never discussed, my first foray into boundary setting came well into my 30s.